Grateful Gratzies: Birthday Twins!

October 22nd celebrates two of my favorite dudes!

It's Double Trouble days of birth for two men that have each been an integral part of my life.

I met Jed Jackman (or as I always have called him, Jeddy) my first year at the University of Utah. He was my Resident Advisor at the crappy little dormitory halls. He would always make his rounds, and I would inevitably be home baking, cooking, or writing my homesick letters to my friends in California. He and our friend Ron St. Amant became my best friends there at the U.

I recently gave a phone recommendation for Jed for a job in his new home state of Colorado. The prospective employer wanted to know what I thought were Jed's best qualities. It was so easy for me to recommend him because his good qualities are abundant. He has been a true confidant since I've known him. My favorite memories are of Jed & I going on hikes. Our first outing was hiking the skiing trails (which in the summer and fall are open for hiking). We packed a picnic lunch and just talked and talked the entire day. He was always my date to the ballet, the Pope to my bad Catholic school girl for Halloween, a great travel companion to Moab and Mexico. He is a man who is so loyal, warm and caring. He has lived all over the country and in Canada as well for art school, but no matter where he's living, he always maintains our friendship. He picked me up from the depths of despair in Utah and continues to warm my heart whenever we manage to connect after a long game of phone tag.

I am so grateful for his honesty, his compassion, and his never failing support. I love you Jeddy. My own little Star Wars Jedi. You are amazing. I am so blessed to have you in my life and today I celebrate you. My forever friend.

The other Birthday Twin is Dave Scher.

Dave and I have known each other since my first year here in NYC. He and I have been all over the world together and he is someone who I know will be a lifelong friend.  He's never been big on celebrating his day of birth. Today, I celebrate the man who is still an encouraging friend and amazing travel companion.

My favorite memories with Dave I often find when I'm searching through my internal database of trips. We always had such a wonderful time traveling together and his willingness and eagerness to see new things and have new experiences have always been our best moments. He is always finding new & fun things to do in the city and thanks to his perceptive detective work, we always see the best music and shows together. I love thinking back about the first time we met; that "Summer of Dave" was my favorite time with him. We ended up taking a spur of the moment trip to the Islands of Tahiti and have memories that we will never forget.

We would have the best holiday parties. Our annual White Elephant Holiday Party was always a huge hit. I loved putting the whole party together, and Dave hated that damn chocolate fountain. He's always been by my side through all the storms that life has thrown us. He's the karaoke king, the borat, the Lloyd Dobler to my Diane Court. Dave, thank you for being you and always being there for me. You are amazing. I love you. Enjoy your special day.

Gen Art

Last Friday, had the opportunity to attend a GenArt event thanks to the lovely Miss Opal.

Thanks to the kindness of friends, yet once again, I was able to experience NYC in a new way.

Thanks Opal for the invitation, great company, hilarious people watching, and a finale of red shoes at the Immi that I won't forget. 

Grateful Grazies--from my boyfriend to my boyfriend(s)

Dear…

Thank you so much for breaking things of with Tammi when you did. She is the light of my life. I don’t know what I would do without her. She is kind, gracious, beautiful, and loves me for me. I’m sure she loved you for just as you were as well. Thank you for not appreciating that-I am reaping the benefits of your decision. I couldn’t be happier. Thank you for realizing she was far too kind for you. She is too sweet for someone who doesn’t appreciate it. I love her sweetness; I soak it up every day. Thank you for breaking up with her just when I needed her most. We have had the best summer and it wouldn’t have happened if she was still with you. I am grateful for the opportunities we’ve had--great time with her friends and mine, trips to the beach, museums, concerts, plays--we’ve seen it all! It’s been amazing. Thank you for being insecure about your height, age, weight, job... She was right to have loved you, but you understood you were undeserving of that. Thank you for freeing her from your uncompromising and unemotional ways. She was pouring out that love to you. Once you broke up with her, she started filling up that reservoir again and now I am enjoying the benefits of her love and graciousness; it’s overflowing into me!  Thank you for not loving her just the way she is. She now is in full bloom, open-hearted and stronger than ever. Thank you for being so selfish. So uncaring. So unavailable. I am overjoyed with your loss. Thank you for helping her become a great communicator; she is so assertive, decisive and yet willing to compromise. I must say, her expectations are a bit higher now, but I’m willing to rise and meet them. I’ve found they are not unattainable and they are very reasonable. Thank you for helping her realize that there is nothing fundamentally wrong with her. You breaking up had nothing to do with her and all to do with you. Thank you for making that choice. Your choice has been the best choice of her life.  I really appreciate you making her see that she deserves so much more than you were capable of giving. She now sees her strength, the importance of give and take, and her unyielding happiness that exists without you.

Suck it.

Sincerely,
NYC

Grateful Grazies-Jaime Noche

Jamie Knight is my oldest friend. No, wait. She's really young, but she's the friend that I've known the longest. I've called her Jaime Noche for as long as I can remember...

She is one of the most creative people I know. She works as a graphic designer and comes up with some of the most clever ideas I've ever seen. I can picture her right now as she's working on a project: total concentration, so much so that her tongue sticks out the side of her mouth and she leans down into the paper. She has been so generous with her time and talents over the years. She recently created a birthday gift for my mom's 50th birthday that everyone loved. It was so special because it was from Jamie. She's crafted my birthday invites, save the dates, t-shirts, and my recent fave: some dishtowels that aren't necessarily pc (thank goodness!).

Our friendship began in high school and has lasted from Chico to Salt Lake, Roseville to Madrid  & Sacramento to New York. No matter where we've lived, I know Jamie Knight is always going to be in touch. She continues to snail mail, email, call, text and show up whenever I visit my family in Roseville. She's gotten fancy with me to go to the ballet and has sat up with me all night in our matching pjs. There have been times where we have the same outfit in different versions and we often manage to get each the same gift without having planned it. She loves monkeys and on her 21st birthday I got her 21 monkey themed gifts...let's just say I was banned from buying any monkeys ever again!

She has visited me in New York several times and we always have a blast together. We've wandered through the city seeing all the sights, but mostly just enjoying the time with one another. We've had some hip shakin' at The Bear, invited Mates of State to stay with us after a show, buried spoons under a waterfall, swung lightsabers with the top down, had midnight cake runs to Ricks, worn the dorkiest overalls together, been chimpancrazy at Disneyland...she's been there through everything. I was there for the date to a man who kindly followed us around Anthropologie who, last year, became her husband. 

We are very different personalities and her very quiet side offsets my loud nature. She and I are on opposite ends of the spectrum and I often wonder how she puts up with me! She is shy, demure & one classy lady. Despite her quiet side, she is hysterically funny. Her wit and humor add a zing to any time we spend together. We have had so many moments on the phone and in person where I end up in tears because I'm laughing so hard. I have spent so many moments on the phone with her and she makes me feel like she's right here next to me--giving advice, making me smile or giving me a hug. I am so grateful for her. She is truly a person who is authentic. I have loved growing up with her and watching her grow into herself and the amazing woman she is. She is a fabulous friend, sister, daughter and now wife. It's been an amazing journey to take with her and I love that we've been there to support and encourage each other along the way. Although I've had many close friends over the years, Jamie is truly my best friend. She knows all about me and loves me just the same. Even though she's busy forming her new life with marriage and an adorable dog named Gadget, she continues to remain part of my life. I know she's got a whole new little universe that she's forming, but I'm grateful to remain in her orbit. 

Jaimie Noche--Thank you for being my friend, my confidant, my fashion guru and sometimes my sanity. I love you and every moment I am blessed to share with you. My favorite moments are when it's just you and I. The two of us sitting (hopefully with Eddie in your lap) and sharing our memories, hopes, fears, and loves. I love how welcoming you and your family have always been to me. Despite the fact that I feel like a firecracker whenever I visit your fam, I know I am always welcome and I appreciate the warmness you and your family always offer to me. Our most recent slumber party will remain a favorite memory for me for years to come. I am so proud of you and all you have accomplished in your life. You are a woman of strength, beauty, and kindness. I love you Jamie Knight Bryson. Thank you for being you and for being awesome. 

Grateful Grazies-Bob & Darryl

I have two notes in my Teeny Tiny Kitchen; one from each of my parents.

"Tammi-I just wanted to say Thank You. 

Being your mother is one of my greatest joys in life. 

I LOVE YOU. You are wonderfully made. 

Have a wonderful day. Love Mom".

"It's said that all a man has in life is what he leaves behind.

 I leave behind the most wonderful things in the world. 

My kids.

 I love you, Dad".

My mother and father are two of the people I admire most in my life. They met and married when they were just 14 & 17 and I cannot even begin to fathom how they have remained devoted to one another and our family after all these years.

When I was younger, I fully believed I was adopted. I somehow got it in my head that I was the lost princess of somewhere fabulous in Italy (this could be true...my Dad found on our ancestry.com that many of our relatives are Italian! Whoohoo! Where's my castle?). Growing up in a family where all my siblings were blondies, I couldn't fathom that I was part of it all (that and I was just stubborn and thought it was funny). Now, I see just how much a part of each of my parents I really am. I somehow inherited their best qualities and I am so proud to be a part of the family that I belong to.

They both grew up being very self-sufficient. They have always owned their own successful businesses and have worked side by side for over thirty years. They didn't really rely on anyone growing up beyond each other and went through the ups and downs of life, figuring things out along the way.

My mother is one of the most positive people I know. She was most likely the impetus behind Happy Tuesdays, when I think back on it. When I was younger, I remember being baffled by my mother's ability to always see the best in every situation. We would tease her and call her Pollyanna. She is truly an eternal optimist and I'm proud to share that quality with her. I now see what she's known all this time: It's really not worth wasting time being negative. Better just put a smile on your face and get through the rough patches the best you can. Her patience is never ending. I can remember her teaching me to drive my manual Cabriolet in the school parking lot--me trying to figure out the clutch and her never getting upset, antsy, or angry. Just letting me figure it out and gently coaxing and coaching me along the way. She's continued to do this throughout my life and I'm so grateful for it.

My father has set the bar so high for someone in my life being a Man. He is someone who gets his joy in life from helping other people.  He is the hardest worker I know. He has always seen his value in his work but I see it in the person that he is and how he treats people. He is always willing to help someone and do whatever he can for them.  He has the best instincts and street smarts--more than anyone I know. He is so good at reading people and can often suss out people's true intentions. He is person of integrity and honesty. His dedication and discipline are qualities I admire in him and have tried to emulate in my own life. Despite his quiet side, he has an incredibly fun demeanor. Some of my fondest memories are my dad and I roaring at 100 miles an hour in his shiny black Mustang, on our way to karate, blasting Rosanne Cash, me with the biggest grin on my face.

Many years ago, I took to calling my mom Bob. Apparently when I said "Mom" it came out sounding like "Bob". I have no idea how I loved the Newton show so much, but I decided to call my dad Darryl. The names stuck somehow and I affectionately remember that time and my Bob and Darryl. This Grateful Grazie is to thank them.

Bob & Darryl:
Thank you. Thank you for being a constant sense of support and encouragement in my life. Thank you for putting up with me when I've floundered, when I was in a teenage snit and couldn't appreciate all you were doing for me, when I've been too wrapped up in my own life to make a phone call. Thank you for seeing my mistakes, watching them, but having the wisdom to let me make them--knowing that's the only way I would grow and learn. Thank you for supporting all my decisions. I know it can't be easy to watch your daughter do all sorts of crazy things that you can't understand--to have her move across the country, live abroad, date some major d-bags (yes you know this word)...I am so grateful that you know just when to give me advice, the space that I need, or love that I'm needing. Thank you for being there when I cry. You have both been there for me in my darkest moments, sometimes not saying anything, just holding me and listening to me. You've also been there to celebrate my biggest achievements. I am so grateful to have parents that I know are always there for me. You may not agree with my decisions or thoughts, but you still respect me and support me. You told me to follow my dreams and do something I love. You never pressured me to be something you wanted. You had a constant message of being what I wanted. Thank you for giving me every opportunity you could think of and for showing me what it truly means to be a good person. I know that you always did your best, and you continue to do so. I try to live my life this way--giving my best in every situation, to every person, every relationship, every moment. My admiration for you and my gratefulness grows each day. Your commitment to one another and to your family is something I will hope to have one day with my own little family. Thank you for not letting distance or time keep us apart. Despite the fact that Granite Bay, CA is long way away from NYC, I feel closer to you more now than ever before. I love you both so much and I will continue to try to live a life that you are proud of and an integral part of. Thank you for being the best parents that I could imagine. Thank you for being you. You are amazing.