Lilacs, Linen & Lace

October 1st was the beginning of my ninth year here in NYC.

It's been quite a life here. When I first moved here, I don't think I gave much thought to how long I would be here. I just went on vacation by myself for two weeks and then very soon after I moved to Brooklyn. I left behind a very stable, very secure, very adult life. I had a job I loved. A wonderful boyfriend. I lived in a four bedroom house all by myself with Lloyd Dobler. I was surrounded by my family and friends...and yet, somehow, I was driven to come to this crazy town. My life isn't that much different I suppose. I have a job I love, a wonderful boyfriend, amazing friends. The one component that continually draws me back to California is my wonderful family & friends (oh, that and the possibility of fantastic weather year round).

It's been eight years of:

Trips that included:

Tahiti, Moorea, Bora Bora, Huahine, Australia, Mexico, St. Lucia, Barbados, Spain, England, Scotland, Wales, Thailand, Cambodia, Bali, Laos, Myanmar, Puerto Rico, Panama, The New SLC, Moab, Wilmington, Seattle, Tahoe, Monterey, Carmel, Santa Cruz, Santa Barbara, LA, San Diego

Hundreds of dollars shipping things from CA (including my beloved red glitter bar stools that I packed into my luggage, only to sell them when I moved from Brooklyn to the East Village. Whomp whomp whomp).

Acquiring more Kermie's than I know what to do with (the five footer has to go...). I did propose to him though...maybe he's still checking with Piggy.

Reuniting with Deborah Lohse after five years and then having the privilege of dancing with ad hoc Ballet in some amazing venues

Countless Jet Blue flights to Sactown

All my siblings getting married

Ten different teaching jobs

Three different boyfriends

Making new friends

Two new nephews

Three Flat Stanleys

Five Apartments

I kissed a frog, and I liked it.

Some of my favorite memories are hanging out the in backyard at Devoe St. with a building full of dancers. My annual white elephant holiday party with the chocolate fountain and enough food to feed an army. Ladies annual clothing exchange with Deb & Karen parading matching outfits. Dancing at Vig all night long. Performing Her at Joyce Soho. Silo Residency. Maine with Deb. Late night concerts with Greg Peterson. Halloween with Diana. I'd love to hear your favorite memory with me & NYC!

I am the most me and possibly the most crazy I've ever been. I currently live in the smallest apartment I've ever had.  On my favorite block of all time. I have a job and 150 kiddos I adore.  I have the best friends I could ask for. And you know what? I love it all. Every once in a while I think of what my life would be if I would have stayed in Roseville...I'm glad I am where I am. Who I am. Being the me that I'm meant to be. I think it all began in my seventh year of life when I wrote a simple sentence:

Travel alliteration from second grade.

Here's to more years of being nice & nasty in a city I love. 

Thanks NYC. I heart you major.

Cookie Monster

With Summer ending and Fall officially beginning, I thought it was appropriate to make a list of all the treats I baked for summer. I gave myself a challenge of baking every day and trying new things as well, instead of my old standbys that I know people like. There were several repeats (necessary due to time constraints) but I had a wonderful time delivering them on my lovely block, making new friends, and distributing them at the Immigrant. Many of them were from my Martha Stewart Cookie Book, Baking Illustrated, Elana's Pantry & any google searching I would do with my farmer's market finds.

In no particular order :

Iced Oatmeal Applesauce Cookies

Raspberry Cream Sandwiches

Cashew Caramel Cookies

Rosemary Butter Cookies

Chunky Peanut, Chocolate, & Cinnamon Cookies

Peanut Butter Whoopie Pies

Brown Butter Toffee Blondies

Surprise Cookies

Cakey Chocolate Chip Cookies

Thin & Crisp Chocolate Chip Cookies

Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip Oatmeal Cookies

Butterscotch Cashew Blondies

Double Chocolate Brownies

Chocolate Ginger Brownies

Lemon Squares

Gluten Free Strawberry Cupcakes

Strawberry Cream Cheese Cupcakes

Strawberry Shortcake Cupcakes

Peach Cookies

Peach Butter

Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip Cupcakes

Apple Cookies

Inside Out Carrot Cake Cookies

Magic Bars

No Bake Cookies

Magic Peanut Butter Cookies

Flourless Chocolate Cake

Mini Pumpkin Pies

Maple Whipped Cream

Peanut Butter Truffles

Carrot Cake Cupcakes

Carmelitas AKA Tammi Tiger Treats

Oatmeal Butterscotch

Girl Scout Crunk

Gluten Free Chocolate Cupcakes

Lemon Frosted Cookies

White Chocolate Walnut Cookies

Vanilla Cupcakes with Chocolate Frosting

Yellow Cupcakes with Buttercream Icing

Mini Peach Crisps

Lemon Poppyseed Cupcakes

Lemon Meringue Cookies

Congo Bars

Lemon Sauce

White Mountain Chocolate Cupcakes

Lemon Angel Cupcakes

Cinnamon Sugar Puff Cupcakes

Sticky Pecan Upside-down Cupcakes

Chocolate Covered Hi-Hits
Sticky Rice Balls with Sugar Center
Pumpkin Cookies with Brown Butter Frosting
Apple Crisp

Grateful Grazies-Bob & Darryl

I have two notes in my Teeny Tiny Kitchen; one from each of my parents.

"Tammi-I just wanted to say Thank You. 

Being your mother is one of my greatest joys in life. 

I LOVE YOU. You are wonderfully made. 

Have a wonderful day. Love Mom".

"It's said that all a man has in life is what he leaves behind.

 I leave behind the most wonderful things in the world. 

My kids.

 I love you, Dad".

My mother and father are two of the people I admire most in my life. They met and married when they were just 14 & 17 and I cannot even begin to fathom how they have remained devoted to one another and our family after all these years.

When I was younger, I fully believed I was adopted. I somehow got it in my head that I was the lost princess of somewhere fabulous in Italy (this could be true...my Dad found on our ancestry.com that many of our relatives are Italian! Whoohoo! Where's my castle?). Growing up in a family where all my siblings were blondies, I couldn't fathom that I was part of it all (that and I was just stubborn and thought it was funny). Now, I see just how much a part of each of my parents I really am. I somehow inherited their best qualities and I am so proud to be a part of the family that I belong to.

They both grew up being very self-sufficient. They have always owned their own successful businesses and have worked side by side for over thirty years. They didn't really rely on anyone growing up beyond each other and went through the ups and downs of life, figuring things out along the way.

My mother is one of the most positive people I know. She was most likely the impetus behind Happy Tuesdays, when I think back on it. When I was younger, I remember being baffled by my mother's ability to always see the best in every situation. We would tease her and call her Pollyanna. She is truly an eternal optimist and I'm proud to share that quality with her. I now see what she's known all this time: It's really not worth wasting time being negative. Better just put a smile on your face and get through the rough patches the best you can. Her patience is never ending. I can remember her teaching me to drive my manual Cabriolet in the school parking lot--me trying to figure out the clutch and her never getting upset, antsy, or angry. Just letting me figure it out and gently coaxing and coaching me along the way. She's continued to do this throughout my life and I'm so grateful for it.

My father has set the bar so high for someone in my life being a Man. He is someone who gets his joy in life from helping other people.  He is the hardest worker I know. He has always seen his value in his work but I see it in the person that he is and how he treats people. He is always willing to help someone and do whatever he can for them.  He has the best instincts and street smarts--more than anyone I know. He is so good at reading people and can often suss out people's true intentions. He is person of integrity and honesty. His dedication and discipline are qualities I admire in him and have tried to emulate in my own life. Despite his quiet side, he has an incredibly fun demeanor. Some of my fondest memories are my dad and I roaring at 100 miles an hour in his shiny black Mustang, on our way to karate, blasting Rosanne Cash, me with the biggest grin on my face.

Many years ago, I took to calling my mom Bob. Apparently when I said "Mom" it came out sounding like "Bob". I have no idea how I loved the Newton show so much, but I decided to call my dad Darryl. The names stuck somehow and I affectionately remember that time and my Bob and Darryl. This Grateful Grazie is to thank them.

Bob & Darryl:
Thank you. Thank you for being a constant sense of support and encouragement in my life. Thank you for putting up with me when I've floundered, when I was in a teenage snit and couldn't appreciate all you were doing for me, when I've been too wrapped up in my own life to make a phone call. Thank you for seeing my mistakes, watching them, but having the wisdom to let me make them--knowing that's the only way I would grow and learn. Thank you for supporting all my decisions. I know it can't be easy to watch your daughter do all sorts of crazy things that you can't understand--to have her move across the country, live abroad, date some major d-bags (yes you know this word)...I am so grateful that you know just when to give me advice, the space that I need, or love that I'm needing. Thank you for being there when I cry. You have both been there for me in my darkest moments, sometimes not saying anything, just holding me and listening to me. You've also been there to celebrate my biggest achievements. I am so grateful to have parents that I know are always there for me. You may not agree with my decisions or thoughts, but you still respect me and support me. You told me to follow my dreams and do something I love. You never pressured me to be something you wanted. You had a constant message of being what I wanted. Thank you for giving me every opportunity you could think of and for showing me what it truly means to be a good person. I know that you always did your best, and you continue to do so. I try to live my life this way--giving my best in every situation, to every person, every relationship, every moment. My admiration for you and my gratefulness grows each day. Your commitment to one another and to your family is something I will hope to have one day with my own little family. Thank you for not letting distance or time keep us apart. Despite the fact that Granite Bay, CA is long way away from NYC, I feel closer to you more now than ever before. I love you both so much and I will continue to try to live a life that you are proud of and an integral part of. Thank you for being the best parents that I could imagine. Thank you for being you. You are amazing.

Fast Track

Still feeling out of sorts and totally jet-lagged. Walking around my neighborhood and spending time with my boyfriend, feeling like I'm walking around in a dreamland...

Returned from my trip of a lifetime. 

Solo travel=best thing ever. 

My Top Ten Lessons:

1. Always trust what I've come to call the "Tamstinct". I've always been hesitant to trust myself. I often defer to other people--their thoughts, feelings, decisions, etc. I realize I often know what's best for me. When I'm by myself I'm much more willing to trust my gut instinct and need to do this more often.

2. When you travel alone, you can always have the window seat.

3. When I'm alone and a little uncomfortable or anxious, I talk to myself or hum (I may have said a couple of swear words, lost on the street, trying to find my way across the universe...).

4. I am a logistical mastermind (at times). And decisive. And damn good at being alone (p.s. how am I supposed to ever date again? This seems tricky...).

5. They make it look really easy to iChat on the commercials. It's not.

6. After 21 days of Thai food, you're really REALLY gonna want a burger or steak.

7. Sometimes, it's good to not have a plan. I was delighted every day to not know where I was going to be next, where I would stay, who I would meet. So refreshing.

8. Talk to everyone you can! There are some really faboo people in the world that you can start a conversation with and learn something about a different culture, a new recipe, the best restaurant in town, the hidden bar, the backroad path. Be unafraid. Most people will like you. And if they don't, well, screw 'em.

9. You may not be here tomorrow--take advantage of every situation.

10. Always bring an extra memory card. I like to take a ton of pictures. Whoops. Somehow I forgot just how many pictures I seem to take...Oh, and I still hate pictures of myself.

Number of Days: 21

Number of Think Thin Bars eaten: 15

Flights: 13

Countries: 6 (7 if you count my stopover in Japan)

Interviews and Beaches: 9

Times I got yelled at in the Bangkok Market: 5

Modes of Transportation: 11 

Hours Spent in the Bangkok Airport: 20 1/2

Hours spent in air travel: 59

Number of heels: 1 (number of times I wore heels, once)

Number of pictures: 4,866

Books read: 5 1/2

more to come...